Russia 9

Sometimes you have to know when to stop being active in a conversation and let the person speak their mind. I think very few conversations are truly tit for tat, back and forth. Usually there is the speaker and the active listener. Today, was a good experience in that. Now, I have fully accepted and revel in the fact that I'm the 'quiet one' of our Virgin Islands team group. These people can talk, and most of them are aggressive talkers, just will run you over with words if you are not equally forceful with yours. Of course I lose that game because they are 9 times out of 10 conversations that I am not invested in that deeply to yell to victory. But there is a benefit to talking a whole bunch that I lack. They can summarize their thoughts very well and weave very good stories. I can only keep it short and condensed.

So I was talking to Eddie, our hurdler who went on get gold in his event today btw, so today is pretty much about him. We were initially talking about obese people and how he would never be with someone who lets them self get fat. I was basically playing devils advocate trying to tell him it isn't necessarily a strictly personal choice and how your occupation and the society you fit in also controls your health. It was nice getting into his mind because I have been following him on twitter for about 6 months and he is very opinionated. I was excited to exercise his opinions. The thing I noticed about him is, he has a certain amount of anger, passion. It is generally geared to things being done justly, and efficiently. I really wondered why he was always so concerned with things like that, always complaining about failures of people and systems.

Somehow, the conversation transitioned into how people have babies irresponsibly. He was mad that people gave the excuse 'I didn't know about protection'. He then went on to say then the kid grows up mad that their parents are inexperienced and maybe the dad isn't there. And that's why they are upset when they are adults and stuff. That clicked completely for me. He then said, 'that's what happened to me, dad wasn't there, mom would complain about all these kids, blah blah blah,'. Just by me being there to listen, he was able to have such a good vent, disguised as a conversation. I was glad to be there, for him to see me as safe, for him to not noticeably show pain, but to venture near there and trust I would not make him feel vulnerable to attack. That is one of the greatest compliments you can give me. After the conversation, he gave me a hand-shake, and said, 'nice talk'. So good, made me feel nice. :)

As I have said before, everyone has their own circle, most everyone's is deformed, dented by experiences and growing up unfulfilled. When someone comes off as angry, hot-head, there is a reason there. It is so easy to dismiss people as just a cartoon character who is static and has no reasons behind emotion. We are all a collective experience (shout out to Muhammad, this was a big idea he opened up in my mind) one person's particular disposition is the result of countless other inputs existing in the same whole. So, if it can be imagined, that one persons attitude does not stop at the physicality of the person, it really has no bounds, it really is just a grey area where each of us really 'exists'. But that is getting kinda out there, I'll blog about that when I finalize it more.

Endnote - I saw one of the most beautiful, true buildings today. Just like Regina, it makes me believe in a true possibility of society. My next big step is laying down what a 'fulfilled society' would operate like. It is not enough to denounce the arts, I have to provide at least a frame work. But the problem is that I am basing this Pure life off of cut and dry 'needs'. When I realize that everything is ultimately a 'desire'. Oh well.